Steve Jobs said it

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“There comes a time in life where you have to let go of all the pointless drama and the people who create it and surround yourself with people who make you laugh so hard that you forget the bad and focus soley on the good. After all, life is too short to be anything but happy.”

What do you think of this quote?  I read it and loved it right away, but I’ve been thinking it over.  On the surface it sounds very liberating.  But I wonder about the people you leave behind.  I agree that “pointless drama” should be avoided.  If there isn’t a point to the drama, then by definition it won’t lead to a new understanding or point.    And I agree that the people creating the pointless drama are to be avoided, at least at times, if you can’t remain positive in their presence. But this should not mean we write them out of our lives.

Although this quote sounds liberating, it’s a liberty gained by retreating.  Sure, you can surround yourselves with happy-go-lucky friends who make you laugh.  I bet it would be a lot of fun.  But what about those other people in your life that are not so happy?  Do they deserve to be abandoned because they don’t make you feel good?

I don’t think life is too short to be anything but happy, if it’s at the expense of other people.  Call me a do-good-er, but I love my friends even when they’re sad or angry, depressed or confused, and I like to hang out with them even if they don’t make me feel like laughing.

I think Steve Jobs is expressing a selfish attitude.  You’re number one and only things that make you happy are worth doing?  Right?  I don’t believe that.  I think relationships are sometimes very difficult, and when we’re in those relationships it sometimes becomes dramatic.  Sometimes it feel pointless.  So what?  Do you think it’s better to tear families and friendships apart because you just want to feel happy all the time?  Are you entitled to a life of pure happiness?

To me this is a selfish attitude, and frankly, one that is juvenile.  I hope we all have deeper relationships with people than what’s implied in that quote, that we care enough about others to stay with them through rough times, when they might be stuck and trying to work something out.  Don’t give up on them because they don’t bring a smile to your lips whenever you’re together.

You’d want a friend to do the same for you.

 

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7 responses »

  1. In good times and bad times, I’ll be on your side for ever more…that’s what friends are for.

    This is another Steve Jobs quote I found, and I really like it. I think it’s closer to what he really thinks and feels. In my opinion, the first quote is more about from time to time protecting yourself from pointless drama, but not always avoiding the real issues of relationships. What do you think?

    • I think this quote is Dionne Warwick, but it is a good one. I think that supporting friends through hard times, to help them, is far from sticking around people who are constantly negative and bring you into their drama. Being with a real friend who is having a hard time, can still be fulfilling. Where as being with people who create drama, for no reason than to create drama, is draining and toxic. The reason why he called it “pointless drama” is just that, there is no point to it, it is just more drama. Everyone has enough drama in their lives as it is, without the addition of the extra pointless kind. As hard as it is to do, sometimes people need to be let go of, for self preservation or the protection of others close to you.

      • You’re right. Sometimes we have to walk away, at least for a while. We can’t help people who refuse to give up the pointless drama. I guess I’m saying I don’t like giving up on people. When I do, I usually feel guilty later. If I can, Then I go back after a while and give it another try.

  2. While I think your take on the quote is definitely valid I’m not sure if I agree with you. I don’t think that being happy necessarily means that you’re smiling and perky all the time. I like being with my friends regardless of their mood if I can help them. In helping a friend through a difficult situation I may feel what they’re feeling, but I’m glad that I can be there for them.

    To me, pointless drama is when a friend is having the same problem over and over and even though I’m trying to help them they keep having the same problem and dragging me into it. While I’m glad to help my friends, my hope is that we learn and grow together, rather than staying bogged down in the same plane of existence forever.

  3. Thank you for expressing your point of view. You say, ” I like being with my friends regardless of their mood if I can help them. ” That is my feeling, too. Like you, I don’t want to stay “bogged down in the same plane of existence forever.” I, too, would rather move forward.
    I think it struck me as an excuse to abandon those friends who are spinning their wheels and just need a gentle push in order to get out of a rut. Let’s not walk away from them.

    • I believe the drama becomes pointless when your friend is ‘spinning their wheels’ and despite the fact that we’ve been pushing them (perhaps starting out more gently and then pushing harder) there is nothing you can do to get them out of that rut.

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